Honey, I’m home.
you see, it’s a metaphor
you nominate Leonardo DiCaprio for an Oscar but you don’t let him win
MY GRANDMA GOT ALL A’S IN “ETIQUETTE” (YES THAT WAS AN ACTUAL CLASS IN HER HIGH SCHOOL) AND SHE TOLD ME, “DEAR,” SHE SAID,
“YOU NEVER CROSS YOUR LEGS, YOU CROSS YOUR ANKLES. BUT THE GREAT THING ABOUT YOU LIVING IN THIS GENERATION IS YOU DON’T HAVE TO FOLLOW MY GENERATION’S RULES. SIT THE WAY YOU WANT. IF SOMEONE LOOKS UP YOUR SKIRT, JUST TELL THEM YOUR AUNT MARY WILL KILL THEM.”
WHICH IS TRUE
MY AUNT MARY HAD A SWITCHBLADE IN A SPECIAL POCKET OF HER NIGHTGOWN UNTIL THE DAY SHE DIED
the moral of this story is
1. Sit the way you want.
2. My great aunt Mary was a fucking badass.
how could you fuck up so tremendously
Panic! at the Disco: First & Last Words(Inspired by x)
What? Bisexual? She can’t be bisexual, you’re only bisexual if you’re actively fucking two people of two differing genders at the same exact time. The moment you stop fucking them you’re suddenly not bi anymore. It’s science.
I suppose that means we bi people exist in quantum superposition until someone observes us having sex.